I’ve often heard it said, ‘that a change will do me good’. Those who say it may well believe that their lives are about to change for the better. Yet is this a truism or just another fallacy? Does changing your career or moving from one place to another actually alter anything other than having moved or doing something different?
Will it actually do you any good or will the person you are just resurface in another location? Mostly such quotes are said in humour in the belief that the vicissitudes of life are about to change for the better. It’s almost like believing that your old rusty Ford will restore itself simply through a move to the country. The salt air may be gone but the rusty old Ford remains the same.
It goes without saying that whether we’re poor or rich we are mostly trapped within the person we are. How to escape your mindset may not be of interest to you , yet nonetheless if you attempted to implement such a tactic, you, me and everyone else would struggle. The old Ford with the rust problem would be a far easier proposition.
I’ve heard it said that we are what we eat , except for cannibals who eat what they are. Amusing as it may sound people often change their diets in the hope of changing themselves. Though this may prove successful with some, observation shows that generally many revert back to what they were. It is indeed difficult to escape who you are.
Mind traps
All of us from early in life are entrapped in numerous patterns that readily cement themselves over time. You begin by learning how to eat and drink, how to speak a language or maybe two, how to walk, how to ride a bike and numerous other activities we all take for granted. Your parents, their language, their culture combined with your genetic dispositions and the people you meet will slowly but surely mold you into the person you are.
Your personality, temperament, likes and dislikes, habits both good and bad slowly but surely determine who you are. How many people who smoke started this habit very young? For those smart enough to admit to the dangers, the conquest to give up is a difficult one.
Once a pattern is established it determines who we are. In fact it entraps us whether we like it or not. There are in fact many determinants as to who we are. Some pundits believe it’s our blood type that determines our behaviour while others have suggested it’s the flow of neurotransmitters between our synapses that make us who we are.
Are you a novelty seeker with a spirit of adventure or perhaps a risk averse stay at home type? If so it may be because of the amount of dopamine, serotonin or norepinephrine neurotransmitters buzzing though our brains. While the theories are many and numerous and are often handy excuses for peoples misbehaviours the truth remains that whatever the reason we are all at risk to becoming enslaved by the patterns we adopt throughout our lives. Many such patterns once cemented are no longer patterns but rather deep rooted addictions. Of such addictions there are many:
- Smoking
- Drinking
- Eating
- Working
- Loafing
- Jogging etc.
Whilst some of the above activities may well be good for us they can readily become so entrenched that they control us. Once an activity such as jogging transforms itself into an addiction it could become more harmful to someone than say smoking cigarettes.In the sense that an addict isn’t fully in control.
Our patterns that determine our behaviours are some-what like automated computer programs designed to make life easier for us. It’s like letting the telephone company automatically deduct their bill from our banking account. These determinant human behaviours are far more difficult to alter than stopping the phone company make automated deductions from your bank account.
If you happen to be one of the few interested in personal development you will find the task difficult, though never impossible. Even after much hard work and effort disappointment will often be by your side. You see, however determined you may be these entrenched patterns are like rolling waves coming with the tide.
Some have termed these relapses as an ingrained dominant response. For instance you may be trying to relieve yourself of stress by approaching various occurring problems from different angles. If your temperament is to be quick tempered under pressure this may be such a dominant feature of your personality that it resurfaces so quickly and over whelms you to such an extent that you might give up in despair.
Thus the question arises am I in control or am I driven by these many automated responses and urges, that invariably determines who I am.
How to escape your mindset
In my book ‘Sultans of Motif’ I propose the theory of small2great as a suggestion to achieving greater reward with less effort and less risk. The thinking behind the idea is relatively simple in that small changes designed to achieve greater reward should prove more useful, in that minor hiccups can be readily absorbed due to the minimal size of the output.
If Alexander the great’s men had focused on the depth of the water and the distance between themselves and the island state of Tyre they might not have attempted what they did. Instead they concentrated on one rock at a time until they breached both the depth of water and the distance to the island.
The trick to breaking patterns is to start by thinking small,then you imagine yourself planting the seed of a Sequoia tree. If a tiny little seed can produce a giant of a tree, surely small2great must have other possibilities. Patterns can be broken if you focus on small, remain persistent and think Sequoia.
An enriched environment is a good place to start for anyone wanting to escape their mindset. That doesn’t mean you have to escape the country and find some enchanted far away castle. You don’t have to go any where at all. What might help though are some challenging activities and some interesting people.
Alcoholics who want to stop drinking form friendships with those who have conquered the addiction. The best place to learn to play bridge is with people who already know how to play bridge.
If you’re a person who always gets up at 8am, why not change and get up at 6am. Do something in those 2 hours that you’ve never done before. You could educate yourself by utilising the time to read and study. Maybe you could join an early morning aerobics class or walk your neighbours dog.
What’s to say that a night owl can’t become a morning person. Alter the kind of people you call friends. Make friends with different age groups, different cultures and languages. When you think about it, we’re surrounded by aspects of small2great. Transistors made it possible for radios and computers to make monumental leaps, as did key hole surgery by doing away with large ugly long scars.
The lessons from natures design will out smart us every time. Wherever we care to look small2great is staring us in the face. If you try and alter long entrenched patterns head on in a big way the probability of failure will be higher than if you approached it in the opposite direction. Small incremental changes or adjustments will over time, as in ‘ one rock after another’ bring about changes in yourself that you may never have imagined.
How to escape your mindset isn’t necessarily about putting everything you own into a container and shipping it to the other end of the world. You may get there and little within you may have changed. The old entrenched patterns will swiftly resurface as you go about redesigning your old world. Trapped in a mindset.
Take a deep look inside yourself and try and create patterns a fresh with happiness and a truly better you. Rather than focussing on such ideals as ‘money and acquiring’ think about ‘giving and sharing’ or rather than chasing ‘fame and glory’ pursue ideals that make life better for others not just for you. I learnt a long time ago that there’s an easy and a hard way to approach any given task. I’ve seen people dig up large palm trees, replant them and then watch them die, when a tiny seed would have produced a happier result.
Patterns of the mind are easily formed yet not so readily altered if they’re no longer achieving their desired results. Your mind can be your best friend, however left unchecked it can become an enemy. It can take you to dark and cold corridors and keep you awake on long and lonely nights pondering of better times.
How to escape your mindset is a question confronting us all. Most people choose to leave things as they are for better or for worse. However you decide to approach this dilemma, you may well be just a pattern of your mind or maybe you think you can do better and ‘escape your mindset’.
All the best.
